- A Note from The Coach

- Feature Article: The10 Steps for Turning Your New Year’s Resolutions into Accomplished Wins!

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A Note from the Coach:

Wow! These two weeks since my last ezine just flew by. It seems
like it was only yesterday when I put it to bed and pushed the
button to whisk it off to you. Actually it’s only tomorrow when
I need to be ready to push that button again, yikes!

I have been starting to hear people mumbling about what they
will resolve to do for the next year, while bemoaning what they
didn’t get done this year. I have devoted this issue to laying
out a radically new approach to setting New Year’s Resolutions
and even more important, presenting a plan that will greatly
increase the possibility that next year at this time, you will
be celebrating the completing of your list with few, if any,
bemoans.

I have much to be thankful for this year and I am looking
forward to a great and enjoyable Holiday season, with my family
and especially, my son. I hope you, your family and your
associates have a great Holiday and an even greater year full of
fantastic wins!

You can look forward to the next issue of this ezine on the
first Thursday of next year.

Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is
serious. So Enjoy, Already!

PS: Special Thanks to my son, Manuel, for that great new
picture of me!

The 10 Steps for Turning Your New Year’s Resolutions into
Accomplished Wins

by Jason Wittman, MPS, Life Coach

Here we are at Resolution Time again! This is the time of the
year when we ritualistically take stock of the year almost over,
to assess our accomplishments and make resolutions for the
coming year. Too often we find that the new resolutions we are
making for the coming year have a deja vu feeling about them
because they very closely resemble last year’s resolutions that
were never done. That is a very depressing way to start a new
year! If you can relate to this, here is a proven method to
ensure that a year from now you will be celebrating your winning
year.

The usual way of dealing with resolutions is in terms of goals
and goal fulfillment. That is a set up for failure.
Unfortunately a list of goals or resolutions is little more that
a list of dreams and wishes. The problem with dreams and wishes
is that they are usually made with the unconscious idea that
they will be completed via a magical cure or miraculous
fulfillment of them. That must be what they are thinking because
rarely when folks make a list of resolutions and goals to
accomplish do they attach to them the concrete steps needed to
take them to completion. That dooms them to failure.

I propose a new way of making your resolutions this year. I
propose that you adopt the sports metaphor and view each
resolution as a possible winnable game worth playing. Let’s look
at them the same way you would look at fulfilling one's desire to
win in a sport or a game of mental or physical skill --
baseball, for example. Here are the steps necessary to win at
the game of baseball (assuming you never played but resolve to
do so):

a. You would first question if the resolve and desire was strong
enough to give you the energy and stick-to-it-ness to persevere
through the process of learning and acquiring the skills to win.
Do you want to play the game because of an inner fascination
with it or are you doing so because it will satisfy someone
else’s desire for you to play the game. If it is the latter,
your chances of learning and winning are slim. Even if you do
win, it would be a hollow one and looking back, wouldn’t seem
like it was worth the effort.

b. Assuming that you really, really have a strong desire to
learn and win, the next important step is to decide what part of
the game, what position, you want to specialize in. To do that
you might have to try out all the positions to get a feel for
which ones you have a natural aptitude and as important, which
ones you enjoy playing the most.

c. Having figured out the position, such as “pitcher,” you then
need to acquire the skills of the game.

d. It is very important, at this point to make sure to work
through all your inner game issues and conflicts (“I never was
too good at sports”) that might sabotage your best intentions.

e. Next comes getting the proper equipment and joining a team.

f. And finally, continuing to evaluate how you are doing and
what more needs to be done, learned or practiced to get to the
win at the game of pitching in a baseball game.

Didn't I leave something out of this scenario? Would you ever
think you would be able to effectively accomplish all that
planning, learning the skills, practicing and evaluating the
progress of becoming a winning baseball pitcher without having a
coach? Not likely! Sure, you probably could arrive at the skill
and knowledge needed to win, given much time and
experimentation, but are you willing to spend years
rediscovering what’s already known? If you are willing to do
that, that’s nice, but you would be playing a different game,
the game of reinventing the wheel. With sports, having a coach
is an accepted part of the equation of winning. Most champion
sporting figures, as well as champions in all walks of life have
coaches.

The 9 Steps to Win the Resolutions Game

So now looking at your new New Year’s Resolutions from the same
perspective as we just did for winning at sports, here are the 9
steps to playing your resolutions to win this year:

1. List your Resolutions in terms of winning a game, using the
following format: “I want to win at the game of __________
(doubling my income, cleaning out the garage, etc.) by
__________(a specific date) and answer the following questions
about each one you just wrote:

2. Make sure that you have described your Resolution in a way
that you know exactly what is the outcome you desire. The
following are the guidelines for developing a well-formed
outcome.

a. State it in positive terms. The mind drops the word
“not” out of sentences, so saying, “I do not want to be so
judgmental this year,” is heard by the mind as “I do want to
be…….” Much better to say, “I want to be more accepting of
others this year.”

b. State what it is that you can accomplish by your authority,
by your actions and with the resources that you have or can
acquire. Resolutions that require other people to do something
is a set-up for failure.

c. Use descriptive words that relate to the senses (seeing,
hearing, feeling words). How do you see the outcome; what would
you or others be saying when you achieved it; how would it feel
to get it? Avoid generalized or abstract words. “I want my
property to be more secure,” is way less effective than, “I will
install a video surveillance system.”

d. Contextualize your outcome.
Specifically, in what context do you picture the outcome -
where, with whom, when, and how will you get it?

3. Is this game winnable?

4. Did you give yourself enough time to realistically accomplish
it?

5. Assuming it is winnable, is this game worth playing? Will
winning this game be important to you? Do you really want to or
need to win this one? Is it winnable but really someone else’s
game that would be worth THEIR PLAYING? Is it worth it for you
to play it for them? Answering “no” to these questions are
indicators of non-starters or, at most, winnable games
(resolutions) begrudgingly played and not a prescription for
having fun. Having fun is the real reason for playing and
living, isn’t it?

6. Do you have the skills and resources to accomplish the
resolution? If not, you need to alter the finish date to have
enough time to get your act together? What are the steps you
need to do to accomplish and win this game?

7. Are there any parts inside you that are either subtly or
screamingly suggesting that either you can’t win at this game or
you ought not even attempt this one? Until you address their
concerns and satisfy them, they will sabotage your best efforts
and create failure.

8. Do you have all the tools, working space, equipment and
positive support of friends, family and/or business associates
you might need to win this one?

9. As you progress towards the final end date of the game, how
are you going to know how well you are progressing and what more
do you need to do to end up with a win? In other words, how
are you going to keep score of your progress and make the
required mid-course corrections?

10. Would it be helpful to have a coach that could co-create with
you, and when needed guide and teach the necessary skills, to
have this be a winnable game worth playing? (Hint: Probably!)
Having a coach IS the winner’s edge!

Working this process with each of the items on your list of
Resolutions will allow you to weed out the ones that are just
hope-for-things, other people’s hope-you-do-for-them-things, and
the not-realistic-to-win-at-things. That will leave you with a
list of winnable games (aka resolutions) AND a plan for winning
them. This will ensure that next year at this time you won’t
just be celebrating a New Year. You will be celebrating the
successful conclusion of a Winning Season of Your Life! (Your
coach will be celebrating too, because he only wins when you
win.)

©2006, Jason Wittman

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In future issues, I will be selecting a question that is related
to Life Coaching and/or one of the topics I have presented or
one that you would like me to cover. Just send your questions to
questions@mycoachjason.com

Life Coach Jason Wittman, MPS, brings to his life coaching
practice extensive experience in the therapeutic counseling and
coaching worlds. He is a Certified Hypnotherapist,
Neuro-Linguistic Programming Practitioner and holds a masters in
counseling psychology. He has been coaching his clients to
achieve winning lives for themselves since the mid-1980s. He
believes that any endeavor in life and business can be designed
into a winnable game worth playing. He assists his clients to
design winnable games worth playing and coaches them to win.

If you would like to explore, risk-free, the possibility of
investing in a Life Coaching relationship with me as your coach.
I offer a brief 30 minute phone consultation where we can
discuss your questions about coaching and if I am the right
person for you. If you would like to schedule an appointment,
email me at freeconsultation@mycoachjason.com

Jason Wittman Life Coaching
P.O. Box 46606
West Hollywood, CA 90046
http://MyCoachJason.com
Info@MyCoachJason.com